problems after problems, i really do not know when will i stop facing problems. facing life with positive and endless happiness. i really hate leading my life like this. afterall i have done for this family, this is waht they repay me. im really disappointed with my adik, yes, i may not show the fact that i love her, but i do. it's just her actions now really hurt me deeply. how could she do this me, how could she betray me? im so hurt with her. why must she ?
i feel so bad, i'm not sure why is she becoming like this. why she never think about the consequences?
having just one troublemaker is already enough for the family, i do not need another one to break me down. i simply can't take it anymore. how much i am really disappointed. i find it really hurtful when the person whom you trust, betrayed your trust.
the person that you thought you can rely on is making you disappointed.
why must this happen to my family. it's so hurtful .
Friday, April 9, 2010
Friday, January 1, 2010
2010
finally, 2010!
with a long exhaling... im letting everything in 2009 at rest now. im not gonna hold back anything. i gonna pretend like what that used to happened before is just a nightmare and right now, im wide awake from that whole nightmare. i gonna move on, and look back at him not thinking how useless i am, but HOW GLAD I AM, THAT HE COULD NOT MAKE IT TO MY PRESENT AND FUTURE! in 2010, im not the old julaiha that used to cry over small matter, who is so weak in love. who falls blindly, go heads over heels for any guy. who love a guy whole heartedly. i gonna be strong and stand up for my right. gonna hold back some love, so that i will not be hurt again. to love someone, that i so worthy of my love. not to spend my time, on useless guys. i know, that memories will haunt me, but im not gonna run away from it. i gonna turn that memories into what i call; a lesson learned. i gonna stand back up again and smile with all my heart. im not gonna look at him, thinking that im useless, but i gonna prove to him that, it's a stupid of you to treat me like dat. i'm not gonna be a fool in love again. i gonna find someone that is worth my time and respect me as a girl.
i'm not gonna let other goodd guys off, just because im too hurt because of him. i gonna let this heart open up and to be loved the way i gonna love them:D
dear god, i hope you would grant me all the strength and confidence for me to face this. i know, you love all your followers and you would not let them suffer. i will treat this, as a test for my endurance and patience. everything that happens in life, have a reason behinds it. We were given this test, because God believe that you can overcome it. that's why believe in HIM & everything gonna be alright :D
with a long exhaling... im letting everything in 2009 at rest now. im not gonna hold back anything. i gonna pretend like what that used to happened before is just a nightmare and right now, im wide awake from that whole nightmare. i gonna move on, and look back at him not thinking how useless i am, but HOW GLAD I AM, THAT HE COULD NOT MAKE IT TO MY PRESENT AND FUTURE! in 2010, im not the old julaiha that used to cry over small matter, who is so weak in love. who falls blindly, go heads over heels for any guy. who love a guy whole heartedly. i gonna be strong and stand up for my right. gonna hold back some love, so that i will not be hurt again. to love someone, that i so worthy of my love. not to spend my time, on useless guys. i know, that memories will haunt me, but im not gonna run away from it. i gonna turn that memories into what i call; a lesson learned. i gonna stand back up again and smile with all my heart. im not gonna look at him, thinking that im useless, but i gonna prove to him that, it's a stupid of you to treat me like dat. i'm not gonna be a fool in love again. i gonna find someone that is worth my time and respect me as a girl.
i'm not gonna let other goodd guys off, just because im too hurt because of him. i gonna let this heart open up and to be loved the way i gonna love them:D
dear god, i hope you would grant me all the strength and confidence for me to face this. i know, you love all your followers and you would not let them suffer. i will treat this, as a test for my endurance and patience. everything that happens in life, have a reason behinds it. We were given this test, because God believe that you can overcome it. that's why believe in HIM & everything gonna be alright :D
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